How Do You Contribute?

That is the question that you should be asking yourself when you look at your journey through this life. How or more importantly what do you contribute to your relationships, your family, your community, at work and in the world in general?

This is not about getting yours, your life is about your contribution, the older you get the more you come to understand it. When you are contributing your life makes sense.

Your contribution can be in any way that enhances another's life and it is different for everyone, it's not what and how much, it's that you do make a contribution at all. The more you contribute is relative to the level of happiness you experience. The more you give of yourself the happier your world gets.

Your contribution though isn't about getting you happy, that is just the icing on the cake. I am talking about contribution that comes from the heart, your desire to do something because you can and you know that it is going to enhance someone else's life.

In your relationship you do something that you know will make the other person happy, it can be the smallest of things but it makes them feel cared for, loved, significant.

Everyone is looking to feel significant in some way or another, to know that they matter, whether it be between a husband and a wife, a business and their client, from one family member to another it's significance that is one of the main emotions that humanity is seeking.

Your acknowledgment of another doesn't have to be in a grand gesture, it can be as simple as making an effort to remember their name and call them by it. It can be going that extra mile for someone; just taking the time to really speak to them and hear them, not just talk at them. It's about genuinely enquiring after their wellbeing, instead of it being just something to say in passing where you don't even stand still long enough to hear their reply.

It's a small demonstration of some kind that conveys to them that they matter and that you care about them, their friendship, their love, their custom. It maybe just that it's because they are in your life and your world is a better place for them being in it, even if it's just in that moment. The important thing is that you consciously decide to do so whenever and wherever you can.

Your fellow human beings really do deserve nothing less from you and you in turn will be amazed at the results. Just knowing that you did what you could in that moment for someone else can make you feel on top of the world.

Do You Want To Be Loved?

Stop waiting for people that don't know how to love themselves to love you, before you get how great and wonderful you are.  See yourself through your own eyes truthfully first and then let others see and may be love that You.

Loving yourself shows up in many different ways.  What you say to yourself, what you eat, what you do with your life, who you spend time with.  How often you put yourself first and take the time to do what lights you up inside?  How often do you take the time to make yourself laugh?  Are you good fun to be by yourself?  Do you find yourself interesting?

This is about what you think of you, not what you think other people think of you.  What they think of you, you will never know for real because the majority will never really know what they think about you either.  They will have an idea of the part of you that they get to see, as only you are with You 24/7 and know the story of your life.  So their ideas of you aren't the truth.

This is not vanity, no, it is actually vital maintenance in the upkeep of you, your happiness which dictates the health that you experience in this life.  If you are down on yourself you leave yourself open to ill health however that may show up for you.  Kindness and love towards yourself will keep your immune system strong and you will experience greater health. 

There are no medals given at the end of your life for having loved others and not yourself, for having lived a miserable dull existence because you didn't do what was right for you to experience true happiness.

This is your life experience and yours alone.  You come in alone and you leave alone.  All our encounters with others are experiences of life and a mirror of our own world.  They are there as a guide to our life, so to expect them to give us something before we give it to ourselves is a waste of time.  It can't happen. 

We can only ever see ourselves through our own eyes and we can only ever be truly loved and adored for all that we are by ourselves. When we choose see all that is worth loving and celebrating then we set the example to those around us.  When we don't do that we let those in to our world that reflect that lack of love in the way they treat us.

I can no more be with people that regularly run themselves down than those that are drug addicts.  To be unkind to yourself with words or drugs, they are both as damaging and you can be sure that if people damage themselves in that way they sure aren't ever going to take any better care of you.  They can't because their behaviour towards themselves couldn't happen if they knew how to love and treasure something.  They might need you, but never confuse need with love, because their need for you will always be about what you provide for them, someone to moan at, someone to rage at, someone to be there to prop them up when they can't prop themselves up. 

When you make seeing your greatness a priority and believe me when you take the time to start to see your greatness it is there, no matter who you are; and you give yourself the love you need then you immediately start to raiser the bar of how your loved and how much by others, because you wouldn't let anything less than your level stay in your world.  

Merry-go-round -v- Rollercoaster

People spend a lifetime just trying to get by and to fit in with a life that isn't really of their choosing and it certainly is not one of their making.  There are those that can't and won't settle for this, they know that there is a passion for something else that they feel deep inside themselves.

The challenge is both in discovering what that something else is and having the courage to go against the belief of the masses who choose to ignore the feelings of something more.  The fear the masses would feel of exploring their passion and leaving their tribe is far greater than the seekers desire to experience it.

Both parties need to do what they need to do, but they can find it challenging to be together. More so for the one's trying to keep the status quo; they struggle to watch someone else seemingly breaking 'the rules' that they work so hard and sacrifice too much to maintain.

The passion seekers in life experience the roller coaster, the thrills and the dips of the ride that is life.  If you ride the life coaster enough you know that the dips are part of it and in that knowing you learn to enjoy those too because you know the truly exhilarating stuff is just around the next bend.

As in an adventure park, in life there are many different roller coasters to try, so once you've ridden one a few times there are others with something new to offer. 

Those that pretend they don't have a passion and pretence it is, for even though it may have been hidden away they will have a passion for something; these people have opted for life's merry-go-round, of which there is only one type.  It's safe and secure because all it does is goes around.  For that safety the thrills and the exhilaration of the not knowing what's coming next are sacrificed, and that's ok too, after all our freewill is our greatest gift. The thing is to exercise it consciously, from a place of educated choice, not from fear of the unknown and in a belief system that we have that has never been challenged.

Which ever of life's rides you find yourself on make sure you have first examined and know your reasons for making that choice. Be confident that you are there because you chose to be there.

Know Yourself

All that we learn mentally through our education and life has very little relevance to who we are and will become in the world and what happens to us. So often we are defined by that which can be measured externally; which part of the world we are born in to, which class within that country, the religion that we are told from birth to follow, how well we do in our education through our schooling or the hand-me-downs of our culture. All of these things are used by others to define us and tell us who we are and how we are perceived in this world, good or bad. But when do ‘You’ get a chance to be seen and acknowledged? People are so busy for the most part, unconsciously writing on the slate of who you are, that they and we forget to stop and see our true selves. The You that has been buried underneath all that is, the You that is real, not your social standing, your education, your religion, your skin colour, for you are truly more than that. Your job in the world is to get to know that person and then let them shine, for that You is greater by far than all the labels you wear, and is the You that will bring you the most peace and happiness in this experience called life. It’s the You that you need to come home to, the You that the world desperately needs to see show up in these unsettled times, the You that can and will make the difference, not only your own life but the lives of those that you love and those that you have yet to know. Above all other considerations, be Yourself.